Hoooo boy. I am so sorry that I slipped and decided to consume meat last night.
You see, every Tuesday had been "cheese steak night". I was craving some serious comfort food after my day and couldn't think of anything else. But I also knew that I just wanted the "comfort" part of the food and not the cheese steak in particular. But as I got home and grew more tired because of the puppy and having to get ready for a vet appointment (that later turned out to be scheduled for today) I found I couldn't think. It was probably low blood sugar combined with cutting caffeine out of my diet again. My brain became prune-y and didn't want to work. It was for these reasons I decided that it might be I was tired because of lack of iron and amino acids and decided to get a cheese steak. With fries, of course, and a coca cola.
Had they a vegetarian alternative I probably would have gone with that. But my mind was too far gone at that point and just wanted to relax.
Upon going to pick dinner up with the husband I was overjoyed to see that the place sold veggie burgers, something I plan to take advantage of in the future as the place has bitchin' french fries and other items. We saddled up with our meat n' cheese on a roll and went home.
Having not tasted red meat for the better part of 3 weeks meant that having meat now would allow me to really experience what I was eating from a taste and texture standpoint. So to that end I was interested in seeing how I might feel about something if I was completely conscious of it going in my mouth.
Meat is greasy, salty, and tangy. It was good for the first 2 bites, then the rest of it was sheer hunger taking over. I chawed through that thing like there was no tomorrow, then promptly decided that I was okay with not having another one for a very loooong time.
Following on the tail of this I dealt with a myriad of intestinal disturbances that had not bothered me since we'd begun the purely vegetarian diet, and I had a rather unfun evening being totally aware of what damage a simply cheesesteak with soda can do to me. I have also decided to limit my soda intake in response to this. One a month now. Maybe.
I like that I now have a good physiological reason for not consuming meat. It felt a bit wimpy of me to say "I just can't support the treatment of animals in the agro-businees complex, and I hate the idea of taking a life that could suffer before I consume it." Why don't I eat meat? Because I really hate being doubled over with stomach cramps for 20 minutes while I'm missing my favorite TV show. Also, yeah, I think I could be putting healthier stuff in my mouth than a slab of red beef.
I feel like a sellout that I couldn't just be okay with my emotions on the matter, though.
Edit -upon realizing how well such an experiment worked in convincing me NOT to consume it again, I waited a few days to rebalance and then promptly tried some McDonald's. Aversion therapy worked beautifully in this case, I no longer crave fast food and love that there's a Saladworks within driving distance. McDonald's tore me up badly and it took 2 full days to settle my stomach from it. I can't believe I downed this stuff as a kind!