In one of those weird moments where you look back on things and realize you did something cool without meaning to, I opened up a book of poetry I've been writing in for the better part of 4 years now and began to read.
Cheese factor was the main expectation, and I fully intended to embrace every wincing moment of my words over the years.
But something odd happened. Apparently when I sat down to this book, unnoticed, I was being incredibly sincere with myself and what I was trying to say. The words stumble in places, but the cheese was almost nill. Perhaps to someone else it would be high, but I surprised myself with still being proud of what I'd tried to say. Moreso, that I'd basically managed to say it, and do it via some rather un-crappy wordcraft.
What caught me the most was a poem I didn't even remember that I'd written. As I went over it I realized that everything I truly believed was put down there, and I shocked myself with the plainness with which it was set down.
Of course, I'm going to transcribe it here. Because it's my wish that if anybody is to know what I feel and believe, they this is the short version. A TLDR with heart, if you will....
~Untitled (6/27/07)~If I were to die tomorrow
and words of mine were left behind
I think I would want to be known to say
that an orange is a wonder
even in mid-summer swelling on the branch
because it is swelling on the branch.
Thunderstorms are not scary
and children should learn to count
the space between the light and the boom.
Sunsets happen every day.
They're free and more spectacular
than any cinematic feature.
It is possible to miss firefles
as much as your high school sweetheart.
Breathing is under-rated
and people are too afraid to openly love.
Scotch is okay on ice, but better without.
Poetry shouldn't rhyme,
books don't have to make sense.
A tattoo doesn't make you a degenerate.
Drive to drive. Walk to walk.
Dancing doesn't require 2 legs,
it can be done with the heart.
Sing like no one is watching
when you know damned well they are.
Proudly enjoy music others openly mock.
Fall off something moving fast
or get tackled fiercely in sports
to show yourself you can live through it.
Creativity must have its day
somehow, some way
and do your best not to judge now it manifests.
Burn a marshmallow over a campfire,
then eat it anyway.
Keep a childhood treasure with you all your life,
and love forever the person
who thinks it's cool too, when you share it with them.
Scream once in a scary movie or haunted house,
jump in leaves until you're 50.
Taste at least one snowflake a year,
throw snowballs at friends
and indulge in a snow cone
when you forget how fun they are.
Remember being said isn't bad,
there is no bad or wrong thing in this world.
There is only experience and what we make of it.
These things are tried and true
and one who follows them will live more,
More than human.
I leave you to your own impressions of their veracity -but do suggest if you have not tried any of these yet, reserve judgment until after you've tried them and see if they do not affect some change in your outlook. I swear by these things.